


Honey, I’m Good

by impulsivedandelion



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Based off a song, Crack, Cute, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-09-25 21:06:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20378119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/impulsivedandelion/pseuds/impulsivedandelion
Summary: The one where everyone keeps hitting on Dean, but he just wants to go home to Castiel.





	Honey, I’m Good

**Author's Note:**

> Um so I’m kinda nervous about posting this, but my favorite tumblr buddy gave me confidence (thanks Sheya!!).

It was after a hunt. He was drinking alone at a bar, looking like a single bachelor because Sam and Eileen had left the party to go home fifteen minutes ago. Sam had patted him on the back and told him to walk home after finishing his beer. 

Dean’s head was pleasantly fuzzy, his thoughts blurry enough to block out the bad and highlight the good. The world was glowing. 

Dean grinned into his beer. His smile only widened when he remembered that Cas was walking distance away, probably sitting stiff on the sofa waiting for Dean to come home and melt him with his touch. God, Dean was head-over-heels for his angel, and maybe he wouldn’t admit that sober, but right now he was drunk and unafraid. All he had to do was finish the rest of this beer and then he could go home. God, he was actually looking forward to going home. He practically laughed into his glass. He probably looked like an idiot. 

Someone tapped him on the shoulder. 

He looked down and his eyes caught on dark, strapping heels. His gaze trailed up, over smooth calves, long things, a short black mini skirt, a beautiful red crop top, a plunging neckline revealing tempting cleavage, a thin neck, soft lips, a teasing gaze, shining blonde hair. Beautiful, soft. Dean instinctively thought of his hands trailing over the soft curves, his hands gripping that ass through the skirt and pulling those legs closer to him. But no, something was wrong with that picture. Dean blinked, his head fuzzy. Then it hit him. 

Cas. Castiel. 

Castiel was waiting for him. 

Dean shook his head and moved to get up, but then long, manicured fingers were on his forearm.

“Please, baby, let me buy you a drink. Just one?”

Dean blinked up at the lady standing over him, his gaze leveled with that plunging neckline. It took all his self control not to ogle, not to reach out. Damn, though, those boobs looked so supple. Supple. That was a word Cas would use. 

He shook his head again, trying to clear his thoughts, ashamed at himself for forgetting Cas so quickly. He needed to leave this bar. He was so drunk, if he had even one more shot he’d be so hammered he’d probably black out and wake up with a random stranger lying next to him. And not Cas. He wanted Cas. Not anyone else. 

“Sorry, honey, I’m good.” Dean chuckled to himself and turned his head away, embarrassed for letting the nickname slip out while he was trying to reject someone. 

He casually brushed her hand off of his arm and stood up. He turned around and almost immediately tripped over a leather boot. His face landed flat in something soft that smelled of sweet perfume. It kinda reminded him of a mother, but sexier. No, that was weird. It was comforting. That was the word. Dean smiled. 

He shot up when he realize he’d literally been sniffing someone’s crotch. A... girl’s crotch. A very pretty girl’s crotch. He flushed.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry, I’m, you just smelled really good, and—“

The girl put a delicate finger up to his lips, silencing him. When she spoke, her voice was soft and slow, and reminded him of soft meadows. “I— I usually don’t do things like this, but I wouldn’t mind if you wanted to put your head back there, if you catch my drift?” She blushed and looked down, wrapping her arms around herself shyly. She blinked up at Dean, large brown eyes peering at him from under long eyelashes. 

Dean smiled. “Aw, no, sweetie, I’m sorry. I really shouldn’t.”

He stood up and crashed directly into a girl with heavy eyeliner and a pixie cut. Her dark lips curled up into a smirk. “What, baby?” She drawled, “You’re not really into the good girl schtick?” 

She put a palm on his chest and pushed him against the wall, pushing her body up against his. She leaned in and let her lips graze his ear. “You’re in luck, baby. I can be bad.” Her voice was like sexy caramel. Just the right mix of rough and smooth. 

Dean shuddered. She nipped his earlobe and Dean closed his eyes and bit the inside of his lip, trying desperately to remember why he shouldn’t let her ravish him right here. Cas would know what to do. 

Cas!

He shoved he girl off of him and frantically ran his hands through his hair, trying to increase blood flow to his brain. How drunk was he, exactly? The need to get out of the bar suddenly became more urgent. 

He started running to the door, tripping over tables and long legs and dodging the groping hands and fluttering eyelashes. 

Right when he was about to reach the sweet salvation of cool night air, three girls blocked his path. They had to be models. Smooth skin, deep eyes, exactly Dean’s type. But they weren’t Castiel. Dean would’ve rolled his eyes if he was more sober. 

He tried to shove his way past them, getting increasingly frustrated by the second. He just wanted to go back home to Cas, goddamnit! Was that too much to ask for? 

He almost had his hand on the door handle when hands started massaging his shoulders. He relaxed involuntarily, but not fully. Cas gave the best massages. 

He rolled his shoulders, trying to shrug the hands off, but then someone weaseled their way between him and the door, grabbed both his hands, and put them on her ass, the soft fabric of her miniskirt bunching in Dean’s fingers. 

And don’t get Dean wrong, it was a nice ass. A very nice ass. An ass that would’ve had its own page in Busty Asian Beauties, for sure. But it just felt so wrong. He wanted Cas. Why did everyone keep getting in his way?

Dean was aware that his internal monologue was steadily turning into that of a frustrated toddler who missed his favorite toy. 

He pried his hands away and stepped away, but he was surrounded. All around him, slowly closing in, were beautiful women with long legs and full breasts and luscious hair and thick eyelashes. He felt like an antelope cornered by lionesses, but in a weird situation where the antelope would’ve been very turned on by the lionesses if he hadn’t already been in love with his best friend who also happened to be an angel of the Lord. Okay, fine. Maybe not the best metaphor. But still.   
There was no way he could fight off all these women without someone getting hurt before he reached the door. So he did the next best thing. 

“WOULD EVERYBODY PLEASE STOP HITTING ON ME?!?!! I HAVE A FUCKING BOYFRIEND.”

The entire bar silenced. Eyes blinked at him. Crickets chirped in the distance. But the awkward silence was better than a horde of lionesses.

He gave one last, sweeping glance across the bar filled with beautiful women of every variety. From edgy biker chicks to girls in floral dresses, all hot as hell, all more than willing to spend the night with him. But Dean only saw red. 

“THAT’S RIGHT. I HAVE A BOYFRIEND, FOR FUCKS SAKE, AND I’M IN LOVE WITH HIM!”

And with that, he spun around, pushed past the few women still staring at him in shock, and slammed the door behind him. 

\---

Gabriel and Castiel watched as Dean practically ran out of the bar. Gabriel watched him go with a look of awe and immense respect. 

“Wow, you were right. He really did it!”

Castiel tried not to smile too much. “I told you he would, Gabriel.”

Gabe hummed and stroked his chin. “Maybe I should’ve thrown a hot masculine dude in there, I mean—“

“No.” Castiel glared at the archangel. “He passed, as I expected. Now, if you’re done with your stupid plan of ‘making sure he’s good enough’ for me, I’d like to be home before Dean gets there.” He did the finger quotes, of course. 

There was a flutter of wings, and Castiel was back in the bunker, waiting for Dean to come to him. 

\---

Their home was only a mile away from the bar, but being drunk didn’t really help Dean’s timing. He’d run for maybe two minutes, trying to get away from the bar apparently filled with seductresses as fast as possible. But once he realized none of them were crazed enough to follow him, he’d strolled leisurely, grinning and kicking pebbles on the side of the road and daydreaming of blue eyes and fluffy hair. 

It took Dean fifteen minutes, but he finally collapsed against the bunker door, pounding on it for Cas to let him in. 

The door pulled open and Dean practically stumbled into Castiel’s arm like a baby horse learning to walk for the first time. He found his face pressed into the crook of Castiel’s arms, which were probably supporting seventy-five percent of his body weight at this point. Dean hid his grin as he pressed his face into Castiel’s side and inhaled. Yep, he definitely smelled better than that flowery girl from the bar. 

“Hello, Dean.”

Dean turned his face up and saw Cas smiling down at him, like the sun, but much nicer to look at. He was like, the opposite of a lioness. A fluffy cat that just wanted to cuddle but could also be really sexy and also had the cutest smile and the most intense gaze and got confused at the tiniest things. God, what was with Dean and his awful drunk metaphors? 

Dean stumbled to his feet and pulled Cas closer to him by the lapels of his trench coat so their chests were flush together. And then Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and buried his face in Castiel’s neck. He hummed when Castiel stroked Dean’s back, soothing and firm. Maybe Dean was the one more like a cat. 

“Cas.” His voice was muffled against Castiel’s neck. 

“Yes, Dean?”

“You would not believe what happened to me at the bar today. Tonight.”

Castiel gently pulled Dean’s head off his neck and looked into his eyes. And then they were kissing, and Castiel’s lips were familiar against Dean’s, and Castiel was massaging Dean’s shoulders, and Dean couldn’t resist moving his hands down and pulling Castiel’s hips flush against his, using that beautiful ass as a handle. Dean grinned against Castiel’s lips and attempted to start moving them towards the bedroom, but Castiel pulled away, eyes smiling, and asked “What happened at the bar?”

Dean’s eyes lit up as he remembered. “There were all these girls, Cas. And they were /super hot/. And this one girl slammed me against the wall! And you know what, it was so...” he gestured vaguely with his hands, “annoying?” He leaned forward and planted a small kiss on cheek. “Because you know what? I love you best, angel.”

Castiel pulled Dean towards him in an almost-kiss, because really it was just two smiles pressed against each other. Castiel never understood why Dean called him angel, and it made Dean chuckle when Cas mumbled “I love you too, human.”

**Author's Note:**

> I’m kinda really obsessed with Dean and Cas calling each other Angel and Human, like hjsjjcsjjs. 
> 
> Can u imagine like, Dean comes home one day and is like, “hey, angel!” And Cas does his squinty thing and hesitantly goes “... hello, human.”
> 
> But yeah let me know what u thought!!


End file.
